For the past few month’s I’ve been struggling with my new material. Not really struggling, but have a difficult time completing it. At first, I wanted to write the story in third person, just like my series. I had the story idea, the main characters, the works all done in my head. when I came to write the story something didn’t fell right. I found that I didn’t care to finish it, I was getting lazy, and nothing was getting done. So I stopped for a little while to collect my thoughts. (In reality I just turned into a caveman and tried to convince myself I was meant to be a writer and not to get discouraged). Then, while I was organizing some giveaway books I had set aside for a Writer’s Workshop I came across a book I had wanted to read for a while, but just never got around to it. I knew the author and if you’re into YA you would know the author too. So I read the book, which was written in first person, and I loved it. I finished it in three days which if you know me, you know me finishing a book is a miracle.
The way the book was written was very different. It put a whole other spin to the story and for some reason I decided to try and restart my new story in first person.
Now, I have almost no skill set when it comes to writing. I just do it. So at first I really liked the change because it just made the story fun to write and honestly I sat down everyday for weeks working on forty pages a day. Of course, at first, the story was very third person meets first person because like I said, very little skill set.
So I listened to the advice of some people, i.e. my sisters, and I went back over it and stripped it down. Whenever I do this it reminds me of running your fingers through your hair until there are no more knots. I got forty pages done a day. I’ve reread the prologue more times than I can count. Still, I think it’s good but getting anyone to read it is like pulling teeth.
This is where my problem leaves me.
When I first started writing I literally needed my sister to tell me to keep going after almost every chapter until I just stopped asking. Then the second book I did it less and same with the third. Holy crap I have written three books! Sorry, it blows my mind sometimes. Anyway, since this is a new story and a new POV, I’m nervous about it. Not only that but it’s written as a male protagonist who is not of the same race as me. So there are a lot of things to be nervous about. I’m not going to make everyone happy, I know that, but I’m trying to make it the best it can be.
That’s part of the reason my blogging has died down. I am literally just rerereading everything over and over, yet still, no one besides me has read the whole thing yet. What I try to remind myself is that the author who wrote the book I loved has said something which I am so fucking glad she has stated because most authors don’t say this shit! She has said that there is no rules to writing. Literally, saving fucking grace over here. Because I know that. I’ve known for a long time that no one should have the right to tell you what is right or wrong according to your art.
So, my little loves, after my long rant, I just wanted you to know where I have been for the past few months. Where my head has been because that’s where writers spend most of their time. Soon, I will have good news of some sort, I promise!